Film: The Substance

Nothing could have prepared me for this film. That's not to say it was totally out there, more that the premise didn't quite lend itself to what we finally got. An almost unrecognisable (to me, but still great) Demi Moore stars as the insecure star desperate to cling on to her perceived value.

The film is zany, maybe even a little gonzo and very graphic - at times uncomfortably so. It even threw back to some 80s classics at times (I'm looking at you, The Fly).

One criticism is that it might have laboured its point a bit too much, and as such felt overly long at times. Other than that, The Substance is a curious movie that's worth the time it asks for.

Book: Aurberon, James S. A. Corey

One of the nice things about the novellas in this series is how they're not afraid to jump out of context. Aurberon for example goes right back to the start of the Laconian take over of the human worlds, and the struggles with governorship that comes with such expansion. As such it's a very political story, and one that makes its point succinctly.

It's a nice break from some of the more wild science fiction that's going on elsewhere in the epic, while also showing the cracks in the empire that were there from the start.

A quick win then, and a nice little palate cleanser before the main event and finale to come next.

Film: Beetlejuice Beetlejuice

The first Beetlejuice had no right to be as good as it was. It was culty yet accessible, plot weak but full of character, and just an all round fun time Beetlejuice Beetlejuice is thankfully just more of the same. In fact, it might actually be better.

Sure, maybe it's a bit of a nostalgia fuelled cash in, but the team seemed to have given it a decent shot and further knew what gave the first film the goods. Keaton (perhaps helped by makeup) reprised his role perfectly, and all the random components making up the film came together in the random way that made an overall kind of sense.

If you liked the first you'll likely enjoy this one too. Recommended.

Book: The Last Flight of the Cassandra, James S. A. Corey

At 25 pages long this was hardly a novella - not that it ever claimed to be. Cassandra was actually a super short story first published in The Expanse Role-playing handbook. That makes it even less vital than anything included in Memory's Legion for instance.

That said, it was a quick read with more from the universe of the series. Given its place in the TTRPG it leaves more questions unanswered than otherwise, so don't go in expecting any Easter eggs or the like.

Book: Tiamat's Wrath, James S. A. Corey

Like many epics, there are usually two main antagonists. The human and the non human, the relatable and the unrelatable, the easy and the hard. The Expanse is no different, and Tiamat's Wrath largely deals with mopping up the less of the bad stuff going on in the now expanded galaxy.

In many ways it's because of this that it laboured a bit. Tiamat's Wrath wasn't a slog to read, but it wasn't the easiest either and I'm not sure the payoff (as great as it was) was worth the challenge.

But end it did, and I'm left excited for the final book (novellas aside) being allowed to give full focus to the big bad. On we go.

Twenty

Time is a funny thing. This blog, for example, doesn't feel old but is older than the kids of many of my peers. Amazingly it was only eight when the Olympics happened here in London. Oh and check this - I've been posting here for oooh 4/9ths of my life. That's, like, almost half of it (and yes, that will happen eventually). I've written about movies that have since been rebooted or remade.

So it's clear to say that as sad as it may be, this blog is the longest project I've kept in my life - and will probably keep that record even if I stop now. I think I'm quite proud of that, not that it takes a huge amount of effort to post a review every now and then. I think I've accepted the fact that I'll keep posting as long as Google offer the Blogger platform (which these days might not be a given).

And continuing with the thesis, a decade is also a funny amount of time.  It can pass in a blink of an eye, and yet rationally it's a huge chunk of change. Two decades feels like two decades, but that doesn't mean anything if a decade itself feels so abstract.

Here's to 2034!

Film: Alien: Romulus

After the mild (and not so mild) disappointment of the last two prequels to the Aliens franchise, it was refreshing to hear that this latest entry would be going back to the basics that made the original films so good. After watching the film, I can confirm that Romulus indeed does throwback to the 80s... 

... But if anything it goes a little too far and in some ways becomes a bit of a photocopy. That in itself isn't a bad thing (the stakes aren't that high here people), but just a shame as the film could have easily rested on its own invention instead of labouring as it sometimes did - even some of the effects seemed like they were a few decades old. Then again, even its novelty may have gone too far - although the film is brisk it could have ended a scene earlier and been better for it.

These are all blemishes on an otherwise great film and entry into the series and one that I enjoyed. Recommended.

Food: Goda London

I'm not a huge meat eater. Sure, I'll pick a beefburger over a veggie, but am also perfectly happy with a fish or daal or chana dish. In short, meat itself isn't the biggest draw for me.

This might be because I tend to have eaten excellent meat dishes. Decades of over done not high quality meat that is only passable in a spicy dish may have contributed to my ennui.

So it's coming to a place like Goda that can have quite the effect on the uninitiated like me. Apart from the obvious novelty of an open kitchen and seeing spits being roasted, the food itself was marvellously good and even generous (we over ordered).

Service and experience were also top notch, with our platter coming surprisingly quickly. Goda is a bit on the medium expensive side, with our bill coming to around £35 (but again we did over order).

Goda was a fine place to eat and definitely recommended.

Film: Deadpool & Wolverine

Deadpool is THE gimmick movie. You don't come here for the story, or even the drama or acting. You come for the gags, the adult-rated violence and how the films always want to take you with it.

This is both good and bad. After two films, the danger is that the gimmick wears off, the jokes labour and the whole thing just gets stale and annoying. And given the state of the MCU right now you start to wonder if now's actually the time to try something like this.

Well folks I'm glad to say that it is. D&W was great. On so many (and very familiar) levels. The action was great, the gags were great, and all of the fourth wall breaking stuff landed brilliantly. Not only did it take the mick out of itself, but also Disney, Marvel and Fox - it seems that nothing was off limits here.

It's hard to talk too much about the film without revealing spoilers so I'll stop here with nothing less than a huge recommendation. It's hard to say where D&W ranks in the trilogy but in some ways that's okay in what might be a wonderful superhero trilogy anyway.

Film: Twisters

How does one make a sequel to a film about tornados? Turns out the answer is that with great difficulty; what we have here is more or less a scene by scene remake... okay fine, reimagining of the disaster movie from 1996.

That doesn't make it a bad film per se - but it was as good as any film about tornados can be really. Sure the effects have moved on but ultimately a tornado just doesn't have the villainy of an earthquake or comet or ice age.

And I suspect Twisters knows this, and so over compensates with some panto level drama, running amok with its plot and characters. Oh look, the smug condescending cowboy actually has a heart after all. Puke.

I will admit that the grand finale was pretty great and almost enough to save the rest of the film. But at almost two hours long it doesn't quite get over the line and so unfortunately is one to watch later.

Film: Kill

Well wasn't this a surprise? Yes, you could just call it "an Indian John Wick" but that would actually be a bit unfair - Kill really does manage to stand on its own two feet and if anything the action and violence comes second to the simple-but-broad plot - the turn in this film ranks up there.

But an action film it is first and foremost and it doesn't fall short of that either. The acting otherwise is what you would expect from Bollywood (melodrama and all), but gone are the item numbers or filler. As a result the 1.45 hour runtime is a boon.

Recommended!

Empire - Live

The only non-boardgame podcast I listen to is Empire, hosted by William Dalrymple and Anita Anand. I don't really have anything to compare this podcast to, but the conversational style seems to be unique (and dividing) amongst history podcast enthusiasts, and is exactly why I enjoy it so much. That and the robustness and depth with which the hosts explore a topic.

Seeing them live was rather like listening to the podcast and so there weren't really many surprises here. This being an event, the topic had to be standalone ("Booze and Brews") which although not personally relevant was fun and interesting nonetheless. And in typical Asian fashion the event started and ended late (although it did run at a generous length) and we even had a costume change.

There really isn't much more to add to this review - if you are interested in more the first place to check out would be the podcast itself. Both that and watching them live come thoroughly recommended.

Film: A Quiet Place: Day One

I guess it was bound to happen. After such strong episodes in The Quiet Place(s?) Parts One and Two, trying something "new" was always going to disappoint.

What's really upsetting is that there's nothing actually wrong with the film itself. It's well made, acted and even the dialogue plays its part. What little action there is is also effective. But where the previous instalments were more than that - strong stories of overcoming a particular obstacle, Day One is very much a character piece. Unfortunately this episode in the franchise suffers for that.

As a prequel I suppose there wasn't much new that they could have brought to the universe, but that doesn't make this any less of a shame. One to leave until that boring rainy day.

Food: Smoke & Pepper

After a couple of weeks of fancy meat places, we decided to turn things modest and try a medium fancy gourmet burger place. The stakes were low (there were no steaks on the menu at all), so there wasn't much that we expected to go wrong here.

And we were right. Smoke & Pepper is nothing amazing, but neither was it a disappointment. In line with our general vibe we kept things safe and went for the well understood burgers and they panned out and the inoffensive price was in line.

I don't have a strong enough opinion to recommand this place, but neither would I mind going back. That in itself has its place.

Book: Persepolis Rising, James S. A. Corey

I'll say it again: if there is one thing that The Expanse nails it's its pacing. Book 7 out of 9 is firmly third arc stuff, very Empire Strikes Back, and ultimately one of the better books in the series.

The book was a breeze to read too, not exactly gripping but with a high enough content density that you didn't feel the slog. It was a rebel, no wait, rescue, no actually a heist movie of a story, and it was this linear plot that actually benefited it the most.

Unfortunately this came at the cost of any real science fiction: this was politics and war, and as such The Expanse cements its place in whatever the genre has become over the last decade or so. But to be honest I didn't mind too much as I was having such a good time anyway.

Food: Janna Cafe

Woo, this was a bit of an emotional roller coaster. Not that I often judge a book by its cover, the idea of trying Somalian food in what seemed to be a very under hygienic par joint filled me with dread, and even almost pushed me to something I've never had to do - veto a place. I even avoided using the local restrooms they were that bad.

But before I knew it, it was too late to back out and so we stuck with it. And I have to admit that I'm glad we did as it all just got better from that point onwards.

The menu had four items on it: lamb, beef, salmon and chicken. It also had a bunch of platters, which confused me as they seemed to all be more expensive than their component parts. But eh, this is why I don't run a restaurant.

I went for the diced stir fried beef with spaghetti. And, quite frankly, it was great. Cooked and seasoned to, well I wouldn't say perfection, but maybe to an inoffensive standard, it really did hit the spot. The portion was generous (although I finished the meat, some pasta was left) and at £9 a bit of a bargain too.

I wouldn't say Janna was a hidden gem but it's definitely become my go to now for a quick post ELM meal. And given my initial (and quite frankly current) impression of the rest of the place, I've surprised myself with such a recommendation.

Food: Just Meat Smoke & BBQ

Ah, now this is more like it. There's times when I think that I'm just not a meat person, a kinda foodie imposter syndrome if you will. It takes a place like Just Meat to make me realise that actually I might have an idea of what decent grub is supposed to be like.

The pitch is exactly that - this is a place that specialises in smoked meats of varying types. That's it. Vegetarians or those who like fish have no business here. And as is always with places that have a focus, they know what they're doing.

Now all this said, I did stick with the Loaded Burger, having been burnt already with a poor steak once this week. I can say that the burger at least was great - sizeable and substantial in all the right ways, without overdoing it with poor filler. Others on the table went for the brisket, and although I got to try some towards the end, it was still melt in the mouth done well.

Service was as great as you would expect, with us enjoying the novelty of the external kitchen. If we had come at another time we could have even bought our own picked meat from the adjoining butchers. For now though, baby steps.

Given the what's left on the menu to try, I definitely need to come back for more. Recommended.

Food: T-Bone Steakhouse

I would never bet on a steak being any good. I've been around the block way too many times to live in that much hope, and it's why I'm so impressed the rare time a halal steak is actually good. Either we just don't know how to cook them, or we cheap out and get substandard ingredients.

Unfortunately the steak at T-Bone was not great. I took the easy low-risk option and went for the £20 steak and chips, rare, with my rump steak having already been sliced. This paid off a little as I didn't have to deal with cutting the tough meat myself, although of course that didn't mean my jaw avoided its workout.

That said, a more than a few of the strips I ate tonight were sublime, which leads me to believe the trouble lay on the meat side and not the preparation side. Ultimately it doesn't matter since both need to be on point for the food to be worth it, and unfortunately T-Bone just doesn't reach that standard.

Film: Furiosa: A Mad Max Saga

Mad Max films have never sat well with me. I'm not sure if it's the imagery, the rawness or just how Australian they are, but it always felt a bit too jarring for my tastes. Or at least that's what I thought.

In anticipation of Furiosa, we sat and rewatched Fury Road... and it actually felt better than I remembered. It wasn't as incoherent as I thought it was, and it was far more fun and less creepy too. The start to end action was great and not too much, while the wild pacing actually made a lot of sense.

Of course it's not the film that's changed over time. And I think on balance Furiosa was even better. It was smoother, better acted and just overall better made. Taylor-Joy was just that, while Hemsworth and the rest of the cast supported her well. It was also a lot of fun and is one of those rare films that at 2.5 hours did not overstay its welcome.

Recommended.

Film: Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes

As movie franchises go, the "post-Walberg" attempt are pretty good. The first trilogy was solid, with each of them being different enough to stand alone in a strong set. This, the start of a second trilogy, also starts off on the right foot, getting the basics right while introducing enough nuance and depth to make it a more than just another Ape movie.

It's hard to comment too much on the acting of course, but it was well produced otherwise, with the effects better than ever, and the voice acting just as you would think a talking ape to sound. My only criticism was that it was slightly too long - I reckon a good 20 minutes could have been lopped off to great positive effect.

Recommended.

Aziz Ansari at Bush Hall

Aziz Ansari has always eluded me. To be more specific, I always seemed to hear about his shows after they happen, and by people who really should have invited me when they were booking. So when a friend told me about a show on Friday (ie yesterday), I jumped at the chance and bought in blind. I found out later that the tickets were £60 - Aziz is doing quite well it seems.

The show was just about worth it. After a 30 minute wait (which I'm sure is not normal nor acceptable) we had the warm up acts come on, and both were more than decent. Aziz then came on, and had us laughing for just over an hour over topics covering relationships, religion (which I was surprised about) and international matters. Nothing on Gaza though which was a bit disappointing but otherwise it felt very personal and intimate (although the TMI from some audience members was a bit too much).

Things have changed since the first decade of this century when brown stand-up wasn't funny and Aziz Ansari was always my counter example to that trend. More recently we have more options to choose from but for me Ansari will always be the guy who started genuine brown comedy and I'm glad I finally got the chance to cross seeing him live off of my bucket list.

Food: Tigers Diner

Pre-event meals are always hard to judge well. Are we just excited about the show or is the food really that good? I guess at the very least we know a place is bad if even with that euphoria it manages to upset, but I did think that Tigers was decent even aside from that context.

I went for the Godzilla burger and it was a bit of a monster. The food was good, the vibe great, and none of it ruined our evening. I think times dictate we acknowledge their paltry drinks options (mainly Coke variants) and spade-heads-as-plates was more annoying than cute, but otherwise there was really not much to complain about and a lot to love. Recommended if you happen to be in the Shepherd's Bush area.

Film: The Fall Guy

This was a strange movie. On the surface it appeared to be a solid film and reflected the fun and breezy vibe of the TV show it's based on. Gosling and Blunt did their jobs well, the plot was engaging, and things just progressed at a decent enough pace.

Which is why it was surprising that I fell asleep half way through. I guess there was something very bland about the whole thing, proof that a film is more than the sum of its parts and some kind of jeuje was definitely missing here. In its place was some self awareness, meta and schizophrenia in this movie about a movie, and a lot of it distracted more than enhanced.

Fun enough but hardly a classic.

Film: Boy Kills World

Urgh. The only thing more disappointing about a bad film is one that could have been so much better. BKW had all the right ingredients - a badass protagonist, a twisty plot, some great characters and associated gimmicks and some potentially explosive action. Unfortunately once you scratch the surface it falls short on most counts and so ends up being quite the failure.

Maybe it could have been split into two movies? Or maybe it just needed a bit of love and care? It was too bad to even think about how it could be better, and so unfortunately for me this is one to miss.

Film: Abigail

Abigail is a great film, and gets the basics right in the way a lot of great films do. It's fun, jumpy, pacey and keeps its audience in gripping suspense throughout most of it. The characters are almost caricatures of the usual, but the film is self aware enough to own that and all the other tropes and plot devices it uses to great effect.

The scares are enough - you probably won't have too much trouble sleeping after watching this - but it's really the simple things that keeps the film going. The plot, script and production are all to high enough standard to not get in the way of all the fun.

The ending may falter a little but in the context of the film you really can't expect it to get to the end without taking a little breather. Overall though, Abigail was great and gets a strong recommendation from me.

Book: Strange Dogs, James S. A. Corey

In what can only be described as "what it says on the time", Strange Dogs was definitely strange. The Expanse, as a series, tends to oscillate between the vanilla (space, war, politics) to the fantastical (ancient aliens, warping of physics, "magic") in way that suits its brand of modern sci-fi, and Strange Dogs firmly falls into the latter end of that spectrum.

Characterisation is better than the other novellas, and so this is also one of the better novellas. It may have been slightly on the longer, labouring, side but that didn't stop me from turning its pages.

If this is how the remaining novellas will turn out to be then I look forward to not having to write them off like I was planning to.

Film: Monkey Man

It could have been something much better, but instead Monkey Man saves its best moves for a single set piece, with a second pulling up the rear. In total it's about 30 minutes worth of high octane entertainment costing 90 minutes of some pretty dire dross. It's almost as if the film was designed around those few scenes.

It's a shame because in another life this could have been the other John Wick. Instead I couldn't help but feel a little cheated by the whole thing. Perhaps one to leave for a home viewing then.

Book: Babylon's Ashes, James S. A. Corey

Is it really only book 6? I guess that's a testament to the pacing of this series, as it really does feel like a lot more has happened. And yet ironically this volume was quite flat in terms of any major wider plot development. Which isn't necessarily a bad thing, given the events of the previous book. So maybe a reset then, before the final act?

I suppose just like it is for the characters in the book, Babylon's Ashes is a comfort. We spend time with characters old, seeing them interact in new situations but in the equally old ways. It was all very familiar and safe and low effort, and although I didn't mind it here (with its 700+ pages) I do hope the next novel will bring something else to the table.

Film: Godzilla x Kong: The New Empire

Is it possible for a monster movie to jump the shark? Well I do admit that while I was preparing myself for something ridiculous, what I found was actually not... and somewhat quite fitting in the trajectory that has been the previous films in the series.

I will say that this is largely a Kong movie, with Godzilla pretty much playing second fiddle to the story (of what little there is). But you would come here for the fights and set pieces, and of these things The New Empire does not disappoint.

So not a complete waste of time but hardly a classic. You'll probably already know if you want to watch this.

Film: Dune: Part Two

I have two opinions, possibly related, about Dune: Part Two. Firstly on the superficial level it was an okay film. I enjoyed what I saw, thought it was faithful enough to the book (despite accusations of Islam-erasing - but more on that later), but hardly a classic that I felt the need to ever watch again.

The acting was fine, the writing fine, and the direction... fine. Some of the action was good, if a bit fleeting. So, so far so medium and as it stood it would have gotten a recommendation.

However dig a little deeper and a more insidious and problematic layer can be found. Ultimately this movie is about white-saviourism, religious fundamentalism and its exploitation, and any attempt at not making it about contemporary issues falls pretty flat on its face.

Perhaps still a recommendation then, but with the caveat that you should go with your critical eyes open and not fall for the romanticism and reduction of the subject matter.