Well... It certainly wasn't the car-crash telly I was expecting. On the contrary in fact: I was quite impressed. Tonight we saw in close-up a traditional Indian family, and totally secure and unashamed in being one, not putting on any pretences or pretending to be open minded (even though they actually were).
As a show it was well made: quite "pure" and with no obvious signs of manipulation or rating boosting sleaziness. The mix of reality and interview was well paced, even though I noticed a bunch of continuity blips (Sunny's beard being one of them). Still, the programme as a whole had bags of real moments.
But for me the real talent of the show was in the Grewals. The mum (I can't help but call her auntie) is the star of course, and absolutely the rock she was described as being in the intro; she knows that making the tea doesn't make her a slave or repressed being. The dad makes a wonderful partner (if not, husband): someone who is strong in his opinion and full of honour (the good type) while making them. This quality has obviously been passed down to their kids who, although not intelligent in the obvious and classical sense (i.e. they're not the lawyers or doctors we all seem to want) know exactly where they're at more so than any "professional". Tindy although outgoing has apparently never had a girlfriend, is still a virgin and obviously proud of who he is. Sunny isn't the bragging idiot rudeboy we would automatically assign to someone who looks like that, but instead is a strong and responsible husband-to-be. Shay is just plain hot, but not at the cost of any personality; I loved little things about her like the ease with which she referred to her in-laws as mum and dad; or played with her future brother-in-law; or even stepped up when it came to dying her mum's hair or doing the dishes - all with a smile on her face, despite the situation she found herself to be in.
Maybe it's early days yet but I just can't see anything about the Grewals to cause me to even raise an eyebrow. They're real, they know what's important and are happy to stick to their principles. Most of all it's clear how content they are with their simple lives - there's no chasing status or money or careers or Status-Update-worthy social activities here. It's a rare thing being this content in my opinion.
In fact I actually miss them all a bit now. I can't wait for the next seven episodes!
Wednesday, November 4
The Family
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Spot on. I enjoyed the programme too, a few families I know would do well to take a leaf out of their books, and ditto to your
ReplyDeletetwitter comment about Shay.
Except I have to say something...I think they are this way simply because they are Asian non-muslims. It's something I've encountered and thought about a few times, when I meet Asian members of the opposite sex who aren't Muslim, I think they are generally so laid back, and always leave these encounters thinking 'if only'. Anyway, that's going off on a different tangent altogether, roll on next tuesday and I have already set the sky+ to series link.
I don't think you're on a tangent at all. It's something I've often asked too, about why non-Muslim asians are so much more balanced than us lot, but I usually put it down to grass is greener syndrome. Perhaps it has something to do with them being able to grow and get certain things out of the way at a younger age, whereas we have certain (and sometimes unnecessary) religion-based restrictions placed on us, and so have certain expectations of life/needs to fulfil at a later date, often when it's too late, difficult or inappropriate to do so? Hmm.
ReplyDeleteMaybe. Although Sunny (in the family) didn't come across like a kunjuur, unlike most of our lot do/are.
ReplyDeleteEqually though I know of many Muslims who pay no heed to the religious restrictions? So why do they still act like that? Identity confusion methinks. I think I'm pretty well balanced overall, but really struggle to find like-minded Muslims guys. Then again it could just be an Asian thing?
Don't we all think we're "pretty well balanced"? Or rather, don't we all at least claim to be?
ReplyDeleteI thought Tindy was quite amusing.
Mr O - True. I really, really am though!
ReplyDeleteI actually thing balance is both an easy and common thing. When most of us talk about balance, we actually mean range. To put it mathematically, it's the difference between 1 == 1 and 5 == 5.
ReplyDelete"It's something I've encountered and thought about a few times, when I meet Asian members of the opposite sex who aren't Muslim, I think they are generally so laid back, and always leave these encounters thinking 'if only'."
ReplyDeleteA lot of what we get back in life is based on what we give out. Perhaps you have such a positive experience with non-Muslim girls because in your subconcious you know they aren't serious potentials for you, and your "judgement" switch is at position off. People can sense this.
"Perhaps it has something to do with them being able to grow and get certain things out of the way at a younger age, whereas we have certain (and sometimes unnecessary) religion-based restrictions placed on us, and so have certain expectations of life/needs to fulfil at a later date, often when it's too late, difficult or inappropriate to do so?"
Spot on.
Sorry HonestWaffle, just realised you are female, so replace non-Muslim girls with non-Muslim guys above!
ReplyDeleteVal,
ReplyDeleteFYI Honest Waffle is a girl.
>A lot of what we get back in life is based on what we give out. Perhaps you have such a positive experience with non-Muslim girls because in your subconcious you know they aren't serious potentials for you, and your "judgement" switch is at position off. People can sense this.
You're right here. I'm definitely a more amicable person with "inaccessible" girls, be it 'cos they're non-Muslim, married or whatever reason. To be fair though, I wouldn't call it a "judgement" switch but more of a "considering" switch. I also think it's less about them reacting to me, and more about me putting on a more sensitive pair of goggles.
Honest Waffle is a girl. I've not been called that in ages!
ReplyDeleteVal - I don't think it's judgement,I meet a fair few bit of people, who are not potential partners, and both sexes (not that I'm into girls)
Perhaps also, because they aren't, I can be freer and not feel the need to act in a certain way. I agree with what Shak says, once they are off the radar, there isn't any pressure so to speak.
Being myself though doesn't do me any favours.
I enjoyed it. Enjoyed the last one too. The Grewals look like a really sweet family. Shay's story was so sad that I had a tear(s) in my eye. I didn't notice the interview tactics in the first series. But I am guessing since a lot of the people are not used to the norms of an Asian family that some things needed further elaborations so people don't go all judgemental on them; on issues like when the father asks for tea or when Tindy goes my wife will cook for me etc. Also, it was really nice to see mother and daughter in law getting along so well..
ReplyDeleteHowever, despite all the above, it is a bit creepy that we have family reality show that showcases 'everything' about them. It's like the facebook feeling, knowing too much about someone when you don't really know them...but I'll be watching it next week though.
isn't that the point of tv??
ReplyDeleteI found the Grewals endearing, esp the parents- they were hilarious! My husband and I found ourselves thinking "We know uncle and auntie jee couples like that!"
ReplyDeleteThe amusing questions by the interviewer were "you've never had a girlfriend? you've never had sex?" like its abnormal!
>The amusing questions by the interviewer were "you've never had a girlfriend? you've never had sex?" like its abnormal!
ReplyDeleteWell to be fair it is pretty strange - and I say that as someone in the same position as Tindy.